Giving Presents: A Child's Lesson

Giving Presents at Christmas is a popular tradition around the world. This is because Christmas time is about the most amazing gift that was ever given. The gift of baby Jesus who has changed the course of history and has the power to change people’s lives too.

Christmas can be a pretty exciting time as we also give gifts in remembrance of God’s gift to us. However, for children it can become quite a selfish time if we don’t teach them how to give and receive Christmas gifts.

Toddlers are often showered with Christmas gifts from when they are quite young and have not had the expectation of thinking about others yet. At the ages of 1 and 2 years of age children are probably more interested in the wrapping than the gift. At age 4 – 5 you may be able to get them to go through the motions of giving presents but its not until they are quite a bit older that they will be find giving just as rewarding as getting.

Getting Presents

You might think this is the easy part but how many times have you received something you have been very disappointed in and yet needed to show gratitude and appreciation for the gift! Giving should be more about the thought someone has put into giving a gift than the actual gift itself yet we don’t always feel like that. And we need to teach this to our children. To have a sense of gratitude even if they don’t like the gift itself.

To help with this, you can even set up some of their Christmas gifts where the children don’t receive anything at all. Instead, money is donated to getting a Christmas present for a child in need. Regular practises like this help children (and adults) keep from being too self-focussed.

A great way to get the children involved in this is Operation Christmas Child. You find a shoe box, fill it with gifts for a girl or boy of your chosen age and post it off to be delivered overseas. Your children can help prepare it and send if off!

- Up to age 4 teach children to say thank you when receiving gifts and give kisses if appropriate

- By 5 years teach your child to comment on the gift to show appreciation of the gift given to them

- Stop children from being overwhelmed by so many gifts at one time and stagger them over a few days. Christmas Eve, Christmas morning, Boxing Day etc. If you’re going on a car trip or holiday you can bring out different gifts on different days.

Giving Presents

Giving gifts is really about sending a message to the person that you love and appreciate them. It should never be about how expensive a gift is or putting in your order for what you want. Encourage your children to make a gift as this involves giving of their time as well. Talking about how to look out for people’s likes and dislikes is important too.

- When making presents isn’t possible, encourage children to use their own money when buying. Help them earn it by doing certain jobs and planning this well in advance

- Children under 4 often want to keep the gift themselves if you buy something new. Another option is to get them to choose something they already own to give which will be a big step in learning to teach them to share.


As a parent I would consider the following in developing a desire for giving presents:

- limiting TV exposure to reduce the ‘I want this’, ‘I want that’ syndrome.

- Only take my kids to the shops if they are going to buy for someone else

- Not using a wish list for the children themselves but turn it around and make a wish list of what they think other people might like and choose their favourite to buy or make.

Christmas and giving presents has become overrun by marketing, glitz, glamour and commercialism and the real spirit of giving has all but disappeared. Hopefully with some of these ideas you’ll be able to bring up your children in a way that gives them a generous perspective on thinking and caring for others at this time.

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